This post was suppose to be for last week. My friend encouraged me to write about it since she said it's therapy. The day after that horrendous night, I was so anxious to put lil' dahling to sleep again. I did the bedtime routine but after reading story book, she already anticipated what was going to happen next. So she quickly jumped down from my lap and walked away. She knew I was going to put her into her cot. She seemed to be avoiding sleep and seemed to be afraid of something. My guess is the insect she spotted on her blanket which left her in a screaming and crying fit. Scared the bejammers out of me. I then persuaded and persuaded her to get into bed. Telling her there's nothing to be afraid about but she kept shaking her head. I really lost my control. I think I was near insanity. I stomped out of the room and drop on the dining chair and sobbed uncontrollably. Lil' dahling tailed me and I think she was quite surprised and yet continued talking to me. She even took her little red dog(Patrick) and put on the table, beside my elbow. She also tapped my arm a few times, calling after me. With tears still streaming down my face, I picked up my phone and dialled for my husband. With a very controlled voice I asked him what time he will he come home. He gave me a vague answer and asked me how is lil' dahling doing. Upon hearing that I shouted at him and told him that she refused to go to bed and I've lost all wits already. He sounded afraid and promised to come home at once.
I mustered myself and went into the kitchen to prepare only 2 fl oz of milk. Lil dahling already looked so tired but she just pretended to be active. A mother knows. She followed me into the room and I fed her. She drank it finish to my surprise. And I lifted her up and put her in her cot. Again she just obeyed and turned to her side to hug her pillow. She closed her eyes at once. I tiptoed out of the room, close the door behind me leaving a little gap. I was so relieved! I came back to check a few minutes later and her position didn't change at all. She was finally asleep. Hey, maybe my tears worked after all. Do I really need to cry everyday? LOL. Alright, therapy session over.