Depressed

I'm in a middle of a crisis now. I'm depressed because yesterday my babysitter told me that she's quitting. I thought I listened wrongly. I thought she meant not taking care only next month. But no, she actually really meant quitting. I was dumbfounded, didn't know what to respond. I didn't respond much. We were quiet for a few seconds.

She did complain about lil' dahling these past few days citing that she's tired and lil' dahling wants to be carried all the time. lil' dahling doesn't want to sleep alone and very scared of noises. Noises that doesn't seem scary to her before, seems scary to her now even the sound of the back door neighbour washing plates. She also said that lil' dahling is naughtier now and not as obedient as before. If she wants something she must have it by hook or by crook. Whoever ask her to always give in, right? I was able to handle a situation like this.

I might suggest a raise but if she's still not game for it then I seriously need to look for another babysitter. I'm just sad that lil' dahling has to go through this. She seems to sense something is going on. She was quiet yesterday when the babysitter broke out the news and today morning she was extra chirpy when the babysitter carried her. Lil' dahling is already so used to her and she likes her. I don't know how she's going to take it and I don't know how she's going to bond with the next babysitter. I feel so rejected like as if my daughter is a problem child that nobody is willing to take care. It's really bad news and every single person I told, asked the question "Why?"

Yeah..why?